Deep down inside of me, right down the hallway from where I keep my skeletons in the closet, was an old not so well lit room. It had no windows, wreaked of stale beer and cigarette smoke and was probably one of the most inhospitable of places you can find if you ask me. I

I will never forget the first time I heard the phrase Surrender to Win. It was shared at one of the 12 step meetings I attended in early recovery. It’s a very powerful statement….but what does it mean? I give up? I’m a loser? My life is just over? I am a failure? Instead of

The screen is blank. A bottle of Pellegrino on the small bronze table ahead. My feet are propped on a blue and white patterned pouf ottoman. I was in the kitchen a few minutes ago before sitting down. Had every intention to write about control, a topic in my AA meeting this morning. But a

  “Don’t die with the music still in you.” – Rosemary O’Connor In this chapter of O’Connor’s self-help book, Rosemary examines the concept of living life in recovery. We don’t get clean or sober to live in a bubble or to just stay frozen in time. While in our addiction, we never thought about the

“Don’t Listen To Yourself. Talk TO yourself.” These were the words of Jon Dorenbos, a pro-football player, contestant on America’s Got Talent. A juicy piece of wisdom he dealt out while shuffling cards for his special brand of magic that was as much inspirational as it was sleight of hand. These powerful words, likely missed by

                      Another morning ruined. Stale mouth and sweat Puking Cringing Memories flashing great atrocities.   In a sick aggressive nature I seek more.        

A single mirrored drop of water sails through thick coastal air. A single drop expelled from heavy gray clouds, joins a school of like-minded peers free falling. A single drop swan dives, splatters against my windshield. Pushed aside by the wiper, like a finger washing tears from his cheek. The vent blows cool air in

Sexual trauma and co-dependency….finding the connection will be interesting. In Rosemary O’Connor’s book about taking care of ourselves in order to take care of our kids, she discusses two topics that go to the core of our self-esteem. Trauma consists of a deeply distressing or disturbing experience and it affects us on all levels:  physical,

Sex addicts new to recovery typically have little to no idea how to define sexual sobriety. Sometimes they worry that sexual sobriety is the same as chemical sobriety, where permanently abstaining is the ultimate goal. Many say that if that is the case, they’ll stick with their addiction thank you very much. And would anyone