“Don’t Listen To Yourself. Talk TO yourself.”

These were the words of Jon Dorenbos, a pro-football player, contestant on America’s Got Talent. A juicy piece of wisdom he dealt out while shuffling cards for his special brand of magic that was as much inspirational as it was sleight of hand. These powerful words, likely missed by many, bear repeating

Don’t Listen To Yourself ~Talk to Yourself

What did he mean?

We always talk about how important it is to – Listen to yourself, Listen to your gut.

But when those words and messages are talking smack about how wrong you are, how inadequate you are, how useless you are, or how hopeless your situation is, Listening to yourself is anything but what you should do.

Jon knows this from personal experience. His father violently killed his mother in their home when Jon was 12 years old. What had once been his self-described “Brady Bunch” existence plunged him into an unthinkable, irreversible-life shattering drama.

Dorenbos says; “you basically have to accept the hand you are dealt. When you come to terms with that, it doesn’t matter what you think. Your life is what it is and things happen out of your control. The quicker you can embrace that, the quicker you can move on and do positive things in your life.”

 Don’t Listen to Yourself—TALK to yourself.

We all have voices in our heads that either support or destroy us. The question is who you gonna listen to?

The noise chatter grows louder when we feel sad, uncertain, anxious or depressed because we feed it. If we recognize WE are responsible for keeping those voices active, we have some choices:

None of us would think of continuing to watch a TV show we hated. We’d simply click the remote and turn the station.

Yet we often persist in listening to an inner voice, running like Muzak on a steady loop, without questioning our own ability to turn it off.

So what can we do?

Literally turn the volume down!

Make those voices whisper.

Feed those voices helium.

Change the speed at which they talk and walk those voices out of your ear right down to your thumb and flick them into space.

Manipulating this single modality is a powerful technique used in Neurolignguistic Programming to get rid of the voices in your head that aren’t helpful.

Once you get rid of them then…

Talk TO YOURSELF

This is where your inner coach resides.

The voice and wisdom that sees your wholeness.

Tell yourself the things you WANT TO HEAR, in the tone of voice you want to hear them, with all the exuberance and sincerity you want to hear.

If your mother or father never told you they loved you,  TELL YOURSELF.

The more you tell yourself, the more you get used to the sound.

The more familiar you make something the more you are drawn to that which is familiar.

Make Loving Voices familiar

Make Supportive Words familiar.

Make feeling good familiar.

The more familiar something is the more we do it naturally.

Our primitive brains are hard wired that way. Familiarity is efficient and our brains like efficiency.

If you were dealt a lousy hand, make a new hand~ familiar.

Design your life and start with the voices in your head.

You lead the chorus. Make your words familiar and your brain will begin to search for matching resonance.

Make Believe ~Make Belief Affirmation: I am the voice I want to hear. I talk lovingly and kindly to myself.