I hope you’ve gifted yourself some time to consider your lifestyle choices and where you may need to make improvements. If you didn’t read part one of my blog series on your wellbeing and where to start, you can do so here. In Your wellbeing and where to Start Part 2 we will take a look at our relationships and work situation. But first, how have your attempts at lifestyle upgrade gone?
Progress Not Perfection
As I’ve talked about in part 1, I too am on a crusade to improved wellbeing. As I do with all my coaching clients I begin with the basics and this week that is exactly where I started. My sleep hygiene got a major over hall and I put myself to bed at 9.00pm every night. Part of that hygiene is making sure that I have no distractions keeping me up. Swapping out scrolling social media last thing at night was difficult. Instead making sure my kitchen was tidy and prepared for the morning left me feeling relaxed and calm. I took a shower or a bath, depending on my mood and tucked myself into my warm cosy bed. I read for half an hour, listened to a guided meditation for another half an hour and was asleep by 10pm. Admittedly, I slipped up a little last night and didn’t get to sleep until 11pm. Why? Because I relapsed on TikTok looking at funny dogs. But progress not perfection right?
Outcomes
However, the outcome the morning after a night of good sleep hygiene for me has been increased energy, mood stability, concise decision making and a smile on my face more often. That’s the result of practicing good sleep hygiene for just one week. Imagine what can be achieved with long term practice. I shall keep you updated. I’d also love to hear your outcomes.
Relationships
So let’s talk about our relationships and do a little inventory. A lot of my clients really struggle in this area. What I hear most is about how stretched my clients feel maintaining relationships with friends and partners and feeling lost within that caretaking.
My question, when I hear these concerns is, are these relationships mutually beneficial or are you giving more than you’re receiving? When we sit and really examine the dynamics of relationships that seem to be stressful rather than nurturing, quite a few revelations happen. Firstly, people realise that if they didn’t keep up with calls and texts to their friend or significant other then they would never hear from them at all. Secondly, when addressing a significant other relationship it is often realised that more is also being given than they are receiving. Thirdly, a question comes up as to why people maintain these relationships for so long. Perhaps some therapy is required to look into this issue?
Addressing Relationship Issues
Of course most relationships aren’t totally balanced. Everyone’s personality is different and there will always be a discrepancy within relationships. 50/50 is a rarity but when a relationship is 70/30 or worse then it’s time to look at stepping back a bit. Making less calls and effort and observing the results will tell you everything you need to know.
The important relationships with our spouse and children warrant a different approach. Making boundaries, having honest conversations and taking time for your own needs and desires are a must. Honest conversation is something a lot of us don’t want to engage in. It can lead to arguments and disruption. If we are serious about improving our lifestyle and quality of life though, this is non-negotiable.
Often times, because of family dynamic, the roles each person plays within a family unit is never questioned. It is assumed that everything and everyone is cool with how things are. It’s important for each of us to speak our truth.
Work Life Balance
The same rules apply when dealing with our work life. An inventory is the first step to pinpoint where things can improve and understand what you want from a job. Most of us need to work to keep a roof over our heads. We spend more time at work than we do at home, so it makes sense that our work is fulfilling and purposeful. We all have to start somewhere and if you’re in a job that’s not filling your needs and desires it’s time for change. If that means upskilling then taking a night class or an online course may be a good option. Maybe your dissatisfaction can be remedied by a conversation with your boss or manager. Perhaps a completely new job is what’s required and it’s time to update your resume.
Again, it’s important that you make choices about your work life as with your social life to improve your quality of life and wellbeing. Successful choices can only be made through examination and reflection about how our jobs are affecting us physically, emotionally, mentally and financially.
I hope Your Wellbeing and Where to Start Part 2 has given you some food for thought. Please feel free to leave comments or contact me at nicky@intherooms.com for any concerns or question you may have.
See you next week for Part 3.
